a street artist @ san antonio riverwalkI've been reading the book of
Philippians.
So much joy, so much hope, even during such dry times -adds so much color onto the world.Well I do realize that it was God the painter,
that gave me
a whole new perspective in viewing the world I'm living in right now.
Conformity has always prevailed, everyone wants to belong somewhere. Everyone wants to be loved. Everyone wants to be beautiful, young and glamorous. I've come to realize lately that I have been longing to be that 'everyone' so I wouldn't stick out as a weirdo. So disgustingly self-conscious and lacking confidence. If I said this, would people accept me. If I wore this, would they like me. If I had this kind of job, would I be in a okay position in this society. Media has a lot to do with it. But I don't want to blame that alone. It was me who became so weak, lost all the confidence and became another puppet...but when? I don't know. It kind of creeped up on me.I've always been a people-pleaser, so I'm still confused about what my real self is.It's been just so much easier to be what I expect people for me to be.So when I hear a "JUST BE YOURSELF" talk, I get lost instantly trying to come up with what I actually am.But I guess it's simple. Simpler than I thought.God has given me a new perspective. He added color to my otherwise boring life.Of course I have no idea who I am, other than the fact that I'm a wonderful creation of God,because right now I'm just a sketch of whatever I'm supposed to become.But I'm very confident in the belief that God already has the perfect picture in mind -I guess He's just finishing up the sketch and adding color and stuff and even though it might take awhile....I am still His. Nobody can mess with His stuff.I'm so thankful for everything He has blessed me with. He's so awesome. He never gives up on me...and reminds me everyday about His love. It's quite overwhelming."What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things." - Philippians 3:8I love Your presence - jessie lane